hello hello hello welcome to letters from the pain I am your host Army's going to Kia and on your co-host
so we have a great show for you guys tonight I'll have a Juicy Lucy letter but of course before we get into our guest tonight R&B singer lady Bane we are going to sponsors will go inside letter
and then of course we'll bring on the Miss Lovely leaving so coarse sponsors that make letters in the Kim Possible LHS home care for all your home care needs in the New York in tri-state area photography got next door all of your photography needs a more do your designs for all your pressing needs jrc cleanup no job is too big or too small Kryptonite chain 420 clothing wear and of course you can get the link to our website www.ladders.com also you can catch every Sunday evening on Mac TV and I fancied
so make sure if you miss this you go over and check us out over there but anyway
let's definitely get into this letter it's a juicy one
okay
dear letters from the pen
I'm a single mom will my children have a father but I consider myself a single mom raising three children and my children's father refuses to pay child support and he doesn't give me a dime for my children we constantly argue we cannot properly communicate I have asked him to go to counseling so we can attempt to
co-parent healthy for our children he refuses
he doesn't like my children around my new boyfriend I have no problem with him bringing our children around his new girlfriend however the issue that I do have is that him and his new girlfriend disrespects me all the time he has an issue because he feels like I'm always on social media disrespecting him
I'm calling him a deadbeat which he really is a deadbeat however I'm trying to work this out for my children and co-parent healthy does anyone have any advice for me to help me get through this signed I'm desperate
okay so here's what I'm going to say
first of all co-parenting takes time and skill no one ever has been with someone created something with somebody separators and all the sudden it's easy street there's always going to be some snags along the way but I think for both parties the most important thing to address here is the children you have to have some sort of a healthy co-parenting situation for the children and you also need to take care of your kids
you cannot
not take care of your children that
you have created so
it doesn't make sense to me that you're not even taking care of your children and then you took on a whole new relationship cuz I'm sure will I'm not sure cuz these days honey women are the are the men of the household but I'm sure if that's the case that other woman is not going to put up with that for too long and for The Other Woman you should be advocating at that it's your job but you should be pushing him to really have a relationship with his children and to assist with his children
so
that's what I'm going to say about that and then I I think I guess on her part you know everybody's on social media Tuesdays and her ass and you know like you're a deadbeat
listen she's probably hurting she's probably not to make excuses for her because you probably shouldn't go on there and call you a deadbeat but guess what if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck is probably don't want to be considered a deadbeat then maybe you should make yourself not a deadbeat that's all I'm saying because children are growing up in these dysfunctional homes with single parents and your children need both parents and and mothers around here raising raising men
on their own and it's just us at some point in a in a child life especially boys they need that Father Figure to steer them in the right direction so if you do then you need to make yourself
and the letter she didn't State whether she had all girls are boys or a mixture I'm just putting it out there and that you know
when women children first of all boys or girls they they follow the example of the parents so if you're out here treat the mother of your children bad and acting a certain way children at a certain age they realize any understand exactly what that is so it's not like okay you're not recognizing what's going on children are very perceptive put him on child support you need to pay for the you know I have questions so if you know I mean the letter the letter does not State whether or not she has on child support but she is almost sounds like she doesn't and she's just trying to get him to pay
I'm just going to put this out there men hate when women go down and put them on child support but in the same token you force their hand to put you on child support and I'm not saying all of them but a good majority of them do not take care of their children they feel like once they leave a relationship I left the whole relationship but know if you drop little packages off then guess what you are you connected to that person until forever so you need to be careful where you dropping your salami at if you don't want you don't want kids with certain people and you need to know who in the heck you're having kids do it because people are out here just sleep with anybody one night stand this that and the third and then children are being created and now nobody wants children like come on now like we can't we can't we can't be doing that
so I think both parties need to get it together for the mom and this is for all people women and men we know exactly who somebody is we see the signs we see the red flag but sometimes we choose to ignore them but guess what
people know exactly who in the heck after a while who they're getting into bed with okay and at some point your your brain needs to again not your heart your brain needs to kick in and say you know what this person is not right for me this person is treating me like XYZ
and it's not stick around, stick around for a year to see if this person is going to change like no baby we are weak Wii 2 weeks and you're cheating you're doing this or doing that I'm not about to go and say okay I'm a mistake and that let me have a key to bring the little person into this so it just extra Messi
white people have to start using their brains and start you know thinking better then have to start stepping up as fathers
and I hate to bring race and culture and stuff into it but we all know who is the majority not taking care of the kids and what not I mean happens all Races but we all know who's going to Jordy then you want to get mad at me and you're feeling to start crying cuz somebody called you a deadbeat or somebody's talking crap about you on social media so what
change change the outcome of the scenario of your story okay you don't want to be called a deadbeat be a good dad and then maybe she'll post about that
I'm just saying
and the woman that with the new girlfriend that's with the father of the children you need to be being a positive role model as well I mean you can't live with a man that refuses take care of their kids and I think that he's going to do better for you
call sweetie honey there's no men don't go around picking saying okay these three right here I'ma treat really bad but then imma get this one right here and Treat Her Like She's Everything a person they are who they are the genetic makeup is what it is okay
and
I'm not even going to go into into the signs but but you know it just it just is what it is says I mean anybody disagrees with me we can you can call in at 867-6008 and voice your opinion on this let's talk about this let's let's let's talk about this child support issue that men not liking to
pay their child support and I don't understand why you're affecting your children
so
but I do know there are some ratchet moms out there that'll take your child support money and go get their hair and their wig done and not take care of their kids and they looking fly from head to toe and the kids running around snotty nose that's disrespectful to buy let's stop bringing children into the world and not properly caring for them because it's not these children didn't ask to be here
but anyway let her take me off to you
AJC Sports hundred for them children to please please and stop it
and don't be out here with your boyfriend talking about who I'm about to get you my stimulus check he said he's going to flip it yeah okay sweep your ass to a job flip that
anyway
let's
going to get in inside interview
in a minute here
with the lovely miss lady Bane
going to be a good interview tonight because this month is women's history month so it's going to be like girl power all months
and women should be celebrated this month and if you're a guy out there that's not seeing your child support you know just it's women's History Month let me know word that that way take a damn kid but I'm just saying it's women's history month so we should be celebrating women all year long not only for the month of March women in history and women that are currently
in our lives and you know doing big things because when they're out here doing major things and we don't get recognized enough as women for the things that we do
so
recognize your women I said your women at Just Like a Man 2 for the most probably not even going there tonight we stay off that topic special buy her something
Treat Her Like She's Everything cuz guess what the grass is not always greener on the other side and most men think it is but usually it's not and usually you come running back and then by that time another man who knows how to treat her that picked her up and took her on with her way so
so we got I'm out girl lady being in the house we going to get up in here and interview
well I got doing good just talking crap about a letter so that somebody wrote to the show about you baby daddy don't want to pay child support and all these things tail end of it was juicy it was they make baby but don't want to pay and they waiting on that stimulus check like it's coming to me government Snapchat.
going to take that take that $1,400 and children and babies, okay so let's talk about you let's get into the interview with you okay cuz we celebrating women all Montero on all year round for it but let's talk about
El Camino you are born and raised in Detroit that singing since the age of three and another Baptist choir since the age of 5 and I say any and everywhere I could retired police officer and so God had a different plan that led me or rerouted me back to my first love which is music so I'm here now telling my story and you know I'm praising God for using me and my gift to share with the world
wonderful
you know I got to ask you about this so you was a police officer in Detroit by texting by what was like what was your setup like what I started off as a as a regular Patrol cop and then I went to gang squad which is the Delta unit so I worked High crimes almost right off the bed so was never a roof seemed a very fast pace I enjoyed it I enjoyed my time on Forest when people still kind of like police officer
a wave that is by the time I left it was giving us the middle finger so you know but I told Detroit because I still have people that I love that work in their Deli Troy and I just want to make sure they treat people right you know. They're kind of like going on in Detroit I mean I don't know like what year you were there from butt
did you guys ever, go to a. Where
cops are like out there killing black men and
I mean I'm sure that it happens everywhere
I got to say kudos to betray like after that that big Malice Green case you know the doj came in and cleaned up and then more of us got hired and you know we didn't play that you know for Detroit to be I want to stay off the chain City you know you don't really hear that many police involved shootings because we know how to talk to other people we know how the police are people and yes so it wasn't really that wasn't really that bad for us you know it wasn't you didn't really see too many issues with our people going to get ready for mistreating going on for way too long so
we have one of your songs to your love
a video of the video what was the inspiration behind that song
so I was in a relationship that wasn't really accepted you know the interracial relationship and
how mad John after being psychologically abused by my Soca First Love by my first husband and I had given up on love it was like okay I'm just going to do what I do for me and my son imma keep the ball rolling on this fact you used in your corner of the earth imma do my thing but my heart was kind of hard when she wore love and God put somebody in my life that showed me above and beyond what I would think somebody should take to prove their love and John did that for me until the day he died and
yeah I wrote that song in the shower after getting out the hospital and now I just dropped it in my spirit and
so what do you play online real you know and it's a lot of people that are experiencing heartbreak that don't they don't think they can get over they don't think that God can bless them with someone that you love them for them and their flaws you know I think with women there's there's far too much neediness and when I say that I mean women don't know how to love their self they think that they have a man about say that you don't need a man or woman of anybody else to add value to you when you go out to find what you don't want it on yourself God's going to put the right person in your path. Should be there that's right
I got myself everyday you and you girl you know you got to get out hearing and just do you and also I'm back to square one with it all over again it's okay you just focus on yourself and the right person will come to your passes when you go out sometimes you know we dig in the garbage can
I didn't say that
is lettuce a song mostly cuz I want to hear it again cuz I like it song This Is My First Single cheer love and
you drove away the Killer
volume eight
do I have a choice
in transit home.
yes welcome back to let her Send The Pain we are here with the amazing R&B singer ladybank know I know I was listening to it earlier today about that was horrified time at least sign with Royal Court Royal Court Records since I was about 14 years old two little teenagers Detroit and worst experience
I wasn't thinking about singing ever again and she told me use the gift God gave me and I laughed at her I'm like you know but you know that's not going to work and I didn't have any songs written that was
Tumi worth even digging back into and when true love came to me I'll call her up I said CC I'm ready I'm ready and she took the ball and just you know so I thank God for her you know I really do about who produced the song Ain't Heavy He's from Louisiana to Texas now and he's phenomenal great guy he's worked with mystical everybody Mannie Fresh John Legend
Kanye you know just a few other people and I'm just you know I was really how can I sit really not worried but can start of my R&B that's kind of a switch it up and then you know he just he took your loving and ran just did it and hats off to him thank you sing earliest memory would be Patti LaBelle like anytime she came on TV on blue like you know me how to apply I'm glued to the TV when she came on so her Aretha Franklin just older you know the older cat Nat King Cole
who would you work with now that's out currently with men it will be Leslie Odom Jr John Legend I can see anywhere
female
so many you know I will feel bad for even name on right now cuz there's so many do female artist that I would love to collaborate if I could stay with them just right for me you know yeah there's so many dear Liz I know that sounds weird she is in Russia
you know I really can't see her doing R&B but I think to put her to the task youth adult musicians Place instrument that girl is bad I think that'll be a challenge for me which would be good
what I actually what I asked is that she's not afraid to be herself in her own skin and she's not out here looking like the quote on quote industry-standard like our you don't have to be skinny half-naked will she be coming out naked butt
she doesn't she just loves the skin he's in and I think that a great motivation for young girls and other women who feel like they can't be what they want to be because I want plus size are on bigger
I respect her and so now how has it affected you in any way if it has you know it made me want to grind harder and it just made me realize okay I'm still here but I lost so many people my parents both had it they survive thank God you know so many people that I know last year because of and I'm like okay guy with you know what's next for me what's up cuz I got to dig in I'm still breathing you know so yeah it affected me to make me grow up and quit pouting about small stuff you know and I want to say this I got to plug I washed your interview and I just got to stay is so cool to see you know to see people like you and me still digging in the R&B industry when a lot of people don't really recognize it as R&B
and I'm waiting on that new video you about to drive yeso hats off to you I'm just you know anytime I see a female out here just giving it to him in an Arby's sector that's that's what's up Nick here I mean listen we got to bring R&B back because we dying out here everything comes back around and I think R&B is coming back in I mean look at Bruno Mars and he just came up with
Shrek 2 they just teens up and I mean
it's the song is really nice it is
it gives you that good feeling it's like oh you know it's got that old-school feel you know and that's when when artists coming out like the shylights The O'Jays The Manhattans when they was like baby rats name
it wasn't no auto-tune in and let me unedited clip and moved here like maybe you have to get in there and do it again right Anderson Peak Hot Pot Edison Park that's what is Walker's Bruno have one off the seen and I was like wait a minute now.
March 19th March 19th I've been waiting a lifetime for this one so what can we expect for you to bring to the table on this album
don't want to talk about real life I'm going to talk about this it's going to tell a story from beginning to the end and it's going to be something relatable for everybody and the title track Limitless is my life story and it's definitely be breaking through everything to get to where I am and and and accept God's Will and make it sounds like it's going to be how many tracks is on the album tracks that you know you got to give us exclusive
anything for my Arby's sister right that's that's right that's right you know drop the song together we can do the new woman to woman hey girl okay you think they waiting for that because that's right that's right yes
thank you
thank you. Thank you so I'm going to do a concert on the 20th I'm not sure exactly when it's going to be released but I'm looking forward to it just connecting with my crowd and people that's been supporting me from day one I feel like I owe them something you know so did you take the Kobe shot I believe in science but I just about that one
cuz girl
I don't know I seen I don't know I just feel like they pushing away too hard for me so it's something just not right about it I saw a video where there was a empty syringe and I'm I think they didn't think you were going to catch a why do you have to advertise it if it's going to benefit us I didn't understand that you know you have to do so that's where raised concern with me you know yeah
yes this is Cynthia Heath I'm calling from Detroit Michigan
yes I will catch more I just wanted to shout out to the shout out to Lady Bay you know I'm not myself right now but I'm just going to send her plenty of plenty of love and plenty of prayers right now and let him know how much I care for and how much I am I admire you know what she's doing and what she's going to do and what you come become so just want to say shout out and putting in love
thank you so much and I'm sending love to you and Good Vibes and return
and I thank you so much for thinking of me and enough to call in right now God bless you bye-bye bye-bye that's what makes it all worth it being an artist I mean it's a hard grind but I always say if you could touch at least one person that you're doing your job as an artist thank God for that because she sounded like she needed you know she needs some prayers so we going we going we going to pray for her and her mom's in the hospital I know that's got to be hard yeah yeah yeah yeah
what okay on a lighter note
cell
March 20th Universal concert you don't know what is going to be released yet but I'm sure everybody's waiting for it I mean I'm waiting for it I want to see it now that you brought it up
are you thinking that you're going to release it sooner than later so have you been on any other projects besides you know you're single and you're working on what I was in the movie color blind I think they change the release date to due to cold it is I think it's going to come to theaters late spring maybe this summer so that's outside of music but I haven't collabed with anybody just yet I'm looking forward to that yeah so what is the color blind about
well it's about what I want to say just accepting people for who they are you know in the climate that we're going through right now with all of the racial divide you know it has a great climb next to it so yeah I'm looking forward to seeing the finished product I haven't seen the edited version yet and I'm so looking forward to it yeah I think that message really needs to be at the Forefront right now especially what's going on with Meghan Markle thing and all of that you know I don't know just in my opinion people like you love who you love and people are who they are and it doesn't matter what your race is what religion is at the end of the day when we all leave here we go the same way in a highball
the Earth doesn't care if we're blue black brown why why even attempt to just keep the world that way I mean things are so you know interracial now we have another caller caller what's your name and where you calling from
hello my name is Melba East hello how are you
I'm fine I'm calling from New York
New York in the building and how much we love her and it's so excited to see the direction is she going in and all the support she is receiving an awesome lady
thank you so much
I just want to send you some love and appreciation for calling me and support me so much as an indie artist out here and I just really from my heart appreciate you and love you thank you
oh you are more than welcome honey
thank you for calling in Melba you have a good evening thank you you're welcome
I mean it's so just want to be by there listening Indie artists
we do double the work that a major artist does and people don't realize that like the struggle is so real when I have the same kind of budgets Meister artist so it's like weed we're just finding everything and wearing 10 different half then just you just wouldn't even understand what you were in the in the artist
what the struggle is and for people to support in the artist it just is still good and it's amazing because it validates that artists that they're doing the right thing and they're taking all of your time and it like putting it into something if they loved so it's so appreciated that
people are supporting you and you know supporting your movement and has a great I mean we support you can let us in the pan I support you as an artist so you know it and it feels good to talk to another artist that get it like you did it and I appreciate that appreciate your platform you know this is really it's amazing it really is don't try for having me off because I know like there's a lot of first what is a lot of artists and
if the struggle is real and sometimes things can deter any artist from not doing music anymore or trying like not to fulfill their dreams because you get scared and you feel like all what if this doesn't work what if they don't like me but hey you know what everybody is going to like you so I wouldn't care if I touch one person in that audience and you got a fan for life then you know about the dates you know what you're supposed to be doing so we got another call
Idaho Samantha from Houston Texas Highway how are you I'm great I just wanted to tell you that I follow you and a friend of mine told me about you I have a question about a video that you have out called do me
OK Google is there a real spider
why want to leave that up to the imagination I'm talking to my team and we may have some more visuals and music coming to entertain you guys with that song So I'mma leave it up to the station for now
yeah we did cuz my my boyfriend cheated on me with my mom so I really want to hear his freaking I don't know if I can pay it but yeah but I really was able to relate to it and I sent when I sent her honey. Get it off your chest
yes I really want to fuck him out I really want my mom to
and you know I'm like in college on Lake 22 so if it's real cool to see someone that I'm able to relate to weed out the trash thank you guys were out there and people piss so wait okay so your mom sleep with your boyfriend
yeah she did my boyfriend actually left and said he wasn't feeling well and so I stayed where I was as good as my friend and something just told me then head home and I saw the ad for fucking car their hand him my mom my mom was my first love and I gave my virginity and everything so yeah I really wanted I really felt that fucking phone
I'm glad you didn't so stay tuned there's an upside to that song it's it's an Anthem for you to recognize that you can do you things to turn around for you they can you know grades see what I do want to say to you I feel like I need to say this to you because I just hear the pain in your voice sometimes in life things happen for a reason and I know like it's hard to understand at the time that it's happening but when people come into our lives are either there or a lesson or blessing and that was your lesson
and that guy the fucking piece of shit like I'm sorry I'm a stay at what you too and yeah and you know what you like you're better than that then that there's somebody out there that's going to love you for you and Only Love You That Somebody that God made and hand-picked just for you
so if he didn't see what your worth was and fucking okay and your mother I don't like to talk about people's moms fucking size 18 and my mom was 7 first of all first of all what is this man
first of all, you don't send me his information I'm at 7 to ask for a letter to let me tell you something there's plenty of men out here that love women who got me on their bones honey and it's just because you're a size 18 doesn't mean anything wrong with you on sweetie there's plenty of plus size models I hear women that are plus size that are doing their thing and they had their shit together like bone to know let me tell you you don't you don't have don't beat on yourself don't bring yourself down and don't let you test your self-esteem go down neither because at the end of the day before you can love anybody you got to love yourself first okay just take some time work on loving
spell first
and then
whatever God has planned for you but let that be for him to say something like that to you just what he ain't worth it the best the best revenge is getting your stuff together and step out and you make it where and when he comes crawling back look at him and say I ain't got time for that is no way to cross two girls let him he's going to call his cell at least have been there shall by to be strong enough to tell him
no you ain't want me then don't want me now I'm just confused but the mom piece though like if you don't mind me asking like did your mom have any mental health issues
yeah I really think that she's not because of how she's this is not the first time she's done it to her sister when they were teenagers and it's like I've always thought that I was the freaking mom and she was the daughter and she would laugh about that because how I'm bigger than her and she said she look younger and it just it just always liked it seems like I'm competing like I have no reason why she competed with me rather and you know she had had her stuff you know it's just I just all in all I wanted was my mom just feels like love me and support me and she's always just like dog and pretty much and call me bad names so it's whatever but and she's doing you a Rock Island I'm glad you're another plus size queen so thanks again for everything you guys
somebody to talk to someone to vent to somebody just to ever be there for you
and then I'll send you mine and we can always have a conversation so I can get them to let me tell you something I wasn't always a little slim thing and let me tell you I still got some
girl if you ever need any type of support any want to talk to I'm here
is aching for you right now this is why I
you know I'll make sure you go to our website ww.w. Let us entertain. Com drop your information in there are we going to send you what we going to send you a little gift you can pamper yourself and you know show yourself some self-love this is women's history month we need to celebrate one at all year long and trust me you are somebody and don't ever let anybody tell you anything different
did she hang up on us thank you for calling in we don't play with me cuz I need to send him a letter honey girl I want to sit on a rat in a minute
find out when his package day is and how much package you can get in to send him a big-ass bag of dog food package his commissary
wake me up in the women out here you going to sleep with this girl's mom
sounds like a raise at least she was brave enough to speak up on it cuz a lot of people wanted to speak about that cuz a lot of time and they won't they won't speak their truth but I always say it doesn't matter cuz nobody can you tell your own story so nobody else tries to make your story what they want it to be really believe her mother has some some mental health issues going on and she's got some deep-rooted issues because for you to share your own daughter down like that and beat your own daughter down like that you should be ashamed of yourself you don't like don't bring kids into the world cuz it's time I go back to the letter like don't bring kids into the world that you are going to make fucking dysfunctional that you were going to shoot like shit
children grow up to be dysfunctional adult their self to anybody and everybody that they think will love them my God
hell no and you know what I really felt her pain and I think that's what that's what just kind of punched me in the gut but we going to pray for her and hopefully she dropped the information so we can send her some gifts and show her some love so she can show herself some love and understand that you know that she's worthy of being somebody defined you call her what's your name and where you calling from
hello
hello what's your name where you calling from
Bernita Detroit Michigan
hey lady babe thanks for calling me
yes how are you I'm doing well I'm enjoying Good Vibes with these beautiful women here this inspiring other women this is amazing so amazing
hi everyone hello thank you for calling in tonight thank you for watching the show
baseball today
don't even want to listen to the show all night or watching it
I just called in I haven't I'm not updated yet because I called in late but don't worry we have missed on lady being back and you know we going to do this all over again and we going to do a whole girls pan or we can have a few other women on here and we're going to do a whole lot worse show for the women out there because the young lady that just called and just just inspired me that we need to as women we need to lift each other up and help other women that are down and I don't know how to do it that is absolutely sure I was just having a call with one of my elementary friends are we just got re-elected in the store and not knowing and she was like you know
I like Samantha so we are going through some of the same things and issues that you know
listen to We definitely do with a husband boyfriend his family and at the end they give their thought you know just we just need some time just to be able to vent to one another about what's going on absolutely
thank you so much I appreciate it we will definitely keep you posted on when our woman support group show was going to be an OB very soon
wonderful great okay by this day or they don't send you love and hugs and I just want to say thank you for calling in and I just want you to know that you are phenomenal and God's grace will cover you and be with you so thank you and have a blessed night
you say you are welcome to the same as well thank you so that is about time guys ladybank thank you so much for coming on to the show and we're just leaving to talk off air I'm about some future endeavors you guys go out and Download Scream lady being stuff is everywhere on every single platform join us here next Friday we will have Rob Schwartz in the building and he's going to drop some knowledge to some of the Independent Artists and all that good stuff so thank you guys and we will see you next week