From: Admin_man (24.7.177.41)
Subject: Forrest Gump Dies
Date: March 18, 2006 at 3:03 pm PST

The day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to
Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.
However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the
Gatekeeper. St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's certainly
good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell
you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we're
administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test
is short, but you have to pass it before you can get in."

Forrest responds, "It shor is good to be here , St. Peter,
sir. But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shor
hope the test ain't too hard; life was a big enough test as
it was."

St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is
only three questions.

First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T?

Second: How many seconds are there in a year?

Third: What is God's first name?"

Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the
next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, "Now
that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell
me your answers."

Forrest says, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the
week begin with the letter T- that one's easy. That'd be
Today and Tomorrow.

The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's
not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess
I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit . How 'bout the
next one?" "How many seconds in a year?"

"Now that one's harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk
about that a nod I guess the only answer has to be twelve."

Astounded, St . Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve!? Forrest, how in
Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a
year?"

Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd,
February 2nd, March 2nd. . . "

"Hold it, " I see where you're going, I see your point, that
wasn't quite what I had in mind. But I'll have to give you
credit for that one, too. Let's go on with the third and
final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?

"Sure" Forrest replied, "its Andy."

"Andy?!" how in the world did you come up with the name Andy
as the first name of God?"

"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest
replied. "I learnt it from the song. "ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN. . . ."

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest,
run."

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